im gonna be very frank here.
last sat, about de worship service thing.
i have no idea about de sequence, cos leelian hasnt been sending it to me for a longlong time.
like 3 months?
and they say cos they thought xiaoling was IC for projection now that its under Worship team
so they nv send to me.
but that's kinda diff from wad xiaoling told me. she said that im IC, but then...
so there's a conflicting info going arnd here, which may explain why de info's no longer sent to me.
last sat both xiaoling and xinrong dl de sequence.
but it had 1 song missing.
so we type la.

i dont see whats de big hoohaa about this.
seriously, that it warrants a letter from pastor.
and it got many pple who are not directly concerned roped in.
i dont see the point of it.
i think we should just have thrashed it out there and then.
emails can make things misunderstood, esp when you are not clear of the tone, and cannot ask for immediate clarification.

to that issue:
i think that yes, there was a misunderstanding.
that maybe the song wasnt attached, or smthg went wrong over de sending.
but its over.
we just make sure next time round things are smoother, that's enough isnt it.
the impt thing is to get de worship going.
we all have our blindspots.
the band side may sometimes have glitches when cooperating with the pa or projection.
its normal, and we should accept and be more understanding that we can err at times.
for both sides, band and pa or projection.
what matters is that we ensure the same glitches are not recurring.
i believe that's more impt than going down to de root to see who's at fault who made a mistake.
that was not the point i wanted to make last sat
i realise its my fault that i didnt check with leelian.
and well, problem solved, asked her to mail me. so that's done.
as for pointing fingers, i dont believe in that.
its to de situation, and not the person.
if i had been careless and said stuff wrongly, well i apologize.
but i believe this could have just been done privately, not a mass sending of letter.
personal opinions here.
and if there's a letter to be sent, why make information vague?
i think pastor should state that person's name if referring to him/her.
it creates so much suspicion and unrest.
but lets put this aside, and work better in serving God.
i realise its true that we should all make an effort.
but the thing about asking for it, is that, when you're not directly involved, how do you ask?
like for de last 3 months, i wasnt doing projection.
and it was then de sending stopped. so im like, should i ask for it or not?
cos i had assumed that their removing me for the mailing list meant that it was not neccessary for me to get de info.

sigh. all this had affected my studying last night for chem.
majorly.
so much so that i was cryin in the morning on de way to sch.
not that my parents are aware, of course.
but yea.
and you. i didnt bother telling you cos i dont want to you to become an emotional crutch.
so that if one day you'd go away and forget me, i wont be so hard hit. maybe.